In this shitty world...my displeasure with planet earth and all its inhabitants continues...
Unfortunately, I dont have any words to describe just how I feel at the moment but think exile, alienated, dislocated, detached, etc, you know, every post colonial shit out there and I am it.
It has finally dawned on me that it might be time to get the hell out of this country.
Certainly I can't think of LIVING in Nigeria? I'll go nuts there as well...I love my anonymous lifestyle too much. Just the thought of how many people I have to call "sir, madam, aunty, uncle", the thought of all the people I would have to smile at, ask about their families, make small conversation...just the thought of having to explain just why I think "hubby", "sweetheart" (or is it sweetie?) "darling" is never gonna happen in my life, makes me wanna puke (Been there, done that, all penises should please shrivel up and fall off like rotten grapes...mind you, my current unhappiness is not caused by a penis, cos many a penis would love to think that they can wreck havoc on the lives of women. Not so. A penis is exactly what it is, just a damn penis).
I dont know what to do but the fact of life is that I have no friends here, no family....nothing.
I am leaving this shit place...God, I am suffocating!
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17 comments:
U shld take it easy o. u might just need a change of environment. since naija is not the place for u, then u shld think of someplace else.
lol @ ur comment abt penises. I feel the same way but I realize I'll need them (or at least one) at some point in my life.
Abeg, why na?
You have friends jare. I'm a friend and you're yet to reply my email. Maybe I'm one of the ones you are trying to avoid shey? I live here so that must be the case.
Best post i've read in ages...broody rant and funny too.
Your post made me laugh out loud. LMAO. Bang on point about penises. They think they are oh so important when you're just doing u and don't need them really. Literally and mentally. Ok laugh jo, ahn ahn.
Well...if you wan bend pesin ear, I dey sha. You know how to reach me.
And of course you know there may be no penises commenting on this post. It's amazing how fast they shrivel away into oblivion at the first sign of a threat. LOL.
Habitual aliens will empathise and advise you not to act impetuously. It is never as bad as it seems. Allow yourself to catch your breath before you make a decision.
It is at times like this you should reach for your card from Jojo.
This too shall pass.
I see one penis don show face abi na two? Waffy don't publish this o. But then if you're naughty like me, you won't do as you're told. I am soooo LMAO. I'm mad really. Ok laugh now arrrrghhhh!
I want to see a happy post soon o. I know you don't do those often but you so need it now. at least try tongue-in-cheek.
Take it easy ma'am. It will pass eh. When you describe naija, it makes me want to pack up and get out of her fast.
I wrote something on you in one of my posts, even in anger, you still sound great.
The stuff about penises made me laugh.
Hope you feel better soon.
This will pass. You need to breath and you should.
Perhaps you can visit Nigeria for Xmas to calm down
Ah...waffy why not be naughty for once and publish my earlier comment na?
There was I getting ready to bang some heads together...
Actually headbanging can be very therapeutic if handled well against not so hard surfaces.
Now if you don't laugh, I would be banging your head pretty soon.
@ Iwelewa: Yeah,I really think I do.
@Naijalines: see this woman oh! where you think say I dey stay? If I dey UK, you no know say na ya house I for siddon make u dey feed me everyday?
@Patrice: I know...I guess this time around the "bout" seems to be becoming a permanent state.
@naapali: I don look card 5 times today..plus pikiture join self.
@for the love of me: I feel so much better already!
@naijalines: hehehehehehe i swear, i am laughing oh!
@EVERYBODY:
No words can describe exactly how I feel now, as I reply these comments. You have all made me feel better, much better that I felt before I saw these comments. At this moment, my heart is not racing anymore and I think I am gonna take a nap.
Thank you all so much. Lots of love.
@standtall: Yes, I am thinking about it. My mum said the same too. She says I need to "recharge" my battery...meanwhile, she never talk whether na canoe i go take reach dat side!
5 "P"s in a paragraph? Enough to make a "p" swell in the head...
Waffy, coming back to Nigeria is not so bad an idea. Pls think about it, at least here, you’d have friends and family around and you can keep them out of ur biz if you want, really.
What did I tell you three weeks ago?! Move jare, kai. You know my view.
Ide.
I have been in this predicament before... Feeling estranged in the place one spends most of her "good" years...
And this -->I love my anonymous lifestyle too much <-- is one of the reasons I was struggling with the idea of moving back home.
It's not easy but I chose the warmth despite the occasional irritability with overbearing family and friends, versus the cold where my mind was slowly slipping into a spiraling abyss.
Meanwhile, another alternative is/might be living in a neighboring (or not too far) country where you (almost) get the best of both worlds. The warmth, the anonymous factor, and the easy trips home in case emergency replenishing is needed.
Plus, you'll never ever have to deal with Winter ever again...
(but get ready for anything else)
Awww...Waffy, hope you enjoyed your nap. Glad you're feeling better!
Well, well, well.. Sounds like a full featured rant at a minimum... Sometimes being away and feeling lost in the rush can be suffocating.. but guess u have to consider the options in the light of what your long term plan is.... and ask yourself how far along the way you've come..
Think that coming to 9a for the xmas suggestion makes sense.. or at least u could go somehwere and just chill and forget about yr hassles.......
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