Monday, February 25, 2008

I try

I have always loved this song...and the oh so cute guy in it....damn.

Sunday, February 24, 2008

Train stories....

Alice and Heather

I noticed her and her two girls when they came in. She was one of those mums, over active and energetic, like a busy body. I noticed her because she had stood behind me as we waited for the train. I heard her talking to her kids, explaining mundane details loud enough for everybody to hear, I turned around, expecting the kids to be about 3 or 4, because that was the kind of voice she used…you know, the kind that is ever patient and nurturing….so I thought they were little ones…asking their thousand and one questions as usual. I turned around and they were twins…about 10 or 11 years old. I gave the mum a look of disapproval and hoped and prayed that they were not going to be in the same carriage as me. But we all know how these things work, not only were they in my carriage, but the twins had the two seats behind me and their mum had the seat beside me. I was not happy at all. Her seat number was next to the window but she asked me, no, she did not ask. She said “I’ll rather sit by the aisle if that’s okay, you know children; there will be a lot of going back and forth”. I did not say a word; I gave her a frown and sat by the window. Thus, the journey began. Before it even started, the mum made a big show of taking off their jackets and gloves, explaining the details as she did them, packing and unpacking several times. The girls of course, Alice and Heather, asking questions like “should I put the gloves in the pocket?” “Where did you put my jacket?” “did you put it up there?”. Etc etc. Anyway, then it was time for her to settle the ten year olds in their seats. For food, they had sandwiches, chips, candies, grapes, biscuits, sweets, and all sorts of chewing gums. For drinks, orange juice, apple juice and sprite or some kind of soft drink. For reading, comic books, magazines and story books. For music, Discman?(they both had ) and a catalogue of cds. For entertainment, all sorts of board games. All this, for a 4 hour journey…. And the train had a restaurant and shop…..I once travelled 36 hours on a bus with two sandwiches, an apple and a bottle of water….well, let me continue.

She settles them with all their stuff, and the journey begins. Three minutes later, something wheezes over my head and lands on the mother’s lap. A packet of candy. "Open!" she screams. That is what the child screamed "open!".I look back the child and frown at her. The mother meekly opens the packet and hands it over to her daughter, Alice. Two minutes later, another item wheezes past my ear, again, landing on their mother’s lap. “I don’t want that cd! Change it!” Again, the mother changes the cd and hands it back to the girl. Five minutes later, “I am thirsty!”. The mother says she should drink her soft drink or apple juice.”No! I want water!” The mother checks their supplies, there is no water. “Go and buy water! Go!” The mother goes to the restaurant, buys water and then makes a big show of serving the girls “here you go, one glass each, be careful now, I’ll just keep the bottle here, do you want more? No? Okay, the water is right here if you want”. Ten minutes later “I want to play a game!” two minutes after “I have to pee!” “I feel sick!” “I want candy!” on and on it went, this big girl went on terrorizing the woman, and the woman just did it all, in a very calm this time, the guy on the other aisle is already sighing. I ignore them and stare out of the window, turning once in a while to eye the kids. After about an hour or so of the journey, I had to switch trains, as I collected my stuff, the mother was carrying one of them in her lap, and reading to them. Aloud, so the whole train could hear. I would have forgiven them all, if she had read anything else, but that....Winnie the fucking pooh!

No more...

There were no seats, the train was overbooked, but I had a seat. I was looking forward to reading and maybe a little writing when I noticed them. I only noticed them because they were the only blacks in the carriage, two young girls, and their grandmother, standing. The next stop was going to be in an hour and half. The old woman looked like she would fall any minute now. The conductor passed them and apologized about the situation. They were 19 other people in the carriage; I waited for about 3 minutes before I did what I knew I had to do. I gave up my seat for the old woman. At the time I did that, another girl had joined the group standing, a white girl, about 19 or so. She was there when I told the old woman to take my seat. At the next stop, an hour and half later, the old woman and her granddaughters went off the train, the old woman thanking me in Amharic and touching my arm as she left. I went back to my seat, the one I had given up for the old woman. Everybody in the carriage had seen me do that, so imagine my surprise when in the space of the two minutes it took for me to get there, the white girl had settled down with her stuff strewn all around her. I stopped in my tracks. For some reason, her action seemed reminded me of another human being I had come across last year...a person that was capable of turning goodness into something despicable...and that was what got me. It got me thinking about how easy it had been for this girl, in that one act, to spoil a good thing. I took a deep breath and smiled, no, nobody was going to make me feel bad for doing a good thing. No more. I smiled at her, and walked to another carriage where I had the pleasure of sitting with an old gentleman that treated me like a lady.

The train was full, there was nowhere to sit, so I hung out between two carriages, I put my back pack on the floor, sat on it and settled into my book....and then, I heard his voice, "excuse me, do you mind if I join you? There are no seats". I looked up...and felt alarming constrictions in my chest..."ehhhh, sure, you can sit beside me if you want, I'll make space for you". I moved my bag and legs out of the way, "Thanks, that's really nice", he sat beside me...damn, if this was not a specimen of a man...he was beautiful. He could not have been more than 20, his height made him impossible to miss, his brown/bronze hair was rough and tussled, like he just woke up, his eyes were piercing...he had ear phones on...he looked like a bloody rock star. He gave me a smile, and closed his eyes, enjoying his music no doubt. I caught myself staring again...and then I remembered...I am not a teenager, I cannot gush over young boys, barely out of their teens. I hissed at the thought, and went back to reading. We made a grab for the two nearest seats, at the next stop. Unfortunately, we got only one. He gave me a rock star smile and said "you have it, its okay, I'll just take your former seat if you don't mind". I smiled..."go ahead"....damn. I am not twenty any more.

Wednesday, February 13, 2008

The number one question

I was so happy when I saw her on facebook, I had heard or seen nothing of her in years. I sent her a message, it captured all my emotions, how great it was to finally find her, what has she been up to, life, school, family, etc. I waited with excitement for her reply. She wrote one sentence "where have u been? are you married?". I did not reply her, I have not replied all the others who after not hearing from me for more than ten years, all they want to know is "are you married?". I remember a cousin of mine telling me how obsessed all her friends became when the big 30 came calling...all they did was talk about who is married, who is not, or who was going to be. I told her my generation is different, we are all well educated, we've seen places, we know things, 70% of my class from secondary school went to universities abroad...yeah girls have failed me.

The past year must have been the most I have been in contact with them. I have not seen or heard from them for ten years. Facebook gave me the opportunity to rekindle friendships long lost, but I am afraid, we are no longer the same people we used to be. The fierce competition with pictures on facebook makes me want to puke. People long married now "updating" their profile picture with their wedding photograph. They do not want to be left behind, while we write the "awwwwwwws" and "aaaaaaahs" under the newly married couples, they want to be appreciated too. It is okay, I understand, I tell them they look so happy together, the cake beautiful, the man so handsome, she must be so lucky to have him, etc. I know how to give compliments, if you are fishing for them, I have them in abundance. So it seems after all these years apart, all my friends want to know is "are you married?". Those who are, get the good old "Thank God" and then they proceed to inform you of others who now have children. If you are not, "they will be praying for you" and also proceed to inform you of those who are now married.

It never ends.... the woman with two kids will look down on the woman with one kid, the woman with one kid looks down on the woman with no kid, the woman that is married will look down on the woman that is "comitted", the woman that is comitted will look down on the woman that has a "fuck buddy", the woman that has a fuck buddy will look down on the woman that has nobody..... and so it continues. Our fight for confirmation from our peers, society, parents, friends.

My friends have failed me, now I only reply those that at least ask "how are you?" that is the basic I expect from them, and a question I ask my friends often, "how are you?", when we get past the basics, then perhaps we can talk about every other thing in our lives. I am tired of that question being the only question being asked, I am tired of that being the only concern amongst women in this day and age. I am tired of women on facebook.

Tuesday, February 12, 2008

A valentine wish....

There was nothing special about the day, it was like any other day, the skies were not blue and the birds did not sing. He made my coffee for me, and we did nothing special, he did not give me a gift and neither did I get him one. The night was nothing special either, no dinner and no rosies. No candle lights and no bath tubs, no chocolates and neither were there perfumes, it was a normal night like every other night. I fell asleep on the sofa, watching my favourite movie. When I woke up, it was almost twelve, and I could hear the soft music coming from the balcony. There was no dinner set, and no petals leading any where. I sat on his lap and buried my face in his chest, he wrapped the blanket around my shoulders and we just sat there, like that. He whispered into my ears, he said, "I know you, soul mate", I smiled and kissed his neck. "I know you too". There was nothing special about the day, it had passed like every other day, and the day had ended like any ordinary day.

Here's wishing you all great love in your lives, not only on valentine's day, but every single day!

Lots of love,

Monday, February 11, 2008

Senator in hot soup!

Accused of "Green card runs", check it out here and please watch the video clip as well, na dat one sweet pass!

Saturday, February 9, 2008

Another favourite Delta Tv jam: Sexual Healing

Oh yeah, I forgot, this came before Billy Ocean...

Yes oh!: Yvonne Chaka Chaka -UMQOMBOTHI-

You know the memories would not be complete without chaka chaka!sorry about the quality but the music is clear and great!

waffy jams:Evi Edna Ogholi - Jealousy

yes naaaaaaaaa

Delta TV saturday music: Harry Belafonte

Okay, I couldn't find the particular concert, but here he is, Harry Belafonte...much older...but still okay!

Another Delta TV Fav: Graceland-Paul Simon Concert in Zimbabwe

Yep....Paul Simon..good times in Zimbabwe...

DELTA TV'S ALL TIME FAVOURITE: billy ocean lover boy

They killed us with this one. Damnnnnn!

Another TV favorite:Eddy Grant - I don't wanna dance

Ohhhhhh the memories..I think this was still during the days of Nta benin.

Thursday, February 7, 2008

Another favourite: Burning Spear African Teacher

Couldn't find the one I wanted, "Columbus", but this one is good as well!

Please stay tuned! (Eek a mouse-bitty bong bong)

Yes, during the days of "BENDEL TELEVISION", this is what we were subjected to listen to during their usual "transmission breaks".

Wednesday, February 6, 2008

Just another stone

Another stone on a path full of stones...I hit my big toe on hurt like hell, but I don't even remember what that stone looked like now...cos it was just like all the other stones on my path, irrelevant until I hit my toe and then it was a nuisance...but just for a while, cos now I am still on my journey, and that stone has joined the other stones by the side of the road, irrelevant, once again. So let me continue....

(was interrupted by phone, so now that thought was left hanging...sorry)

Monday, February 4, 2008

Weekend gist

I did not really plan anything for the weekend cos friday, I thought, was the main day. So saturday morning comes, and the sun is up, I decide to go for a walk,a good habit I have developed since moving(morning walks)to this part of town. Anyway, so I walk my usual route by the sea, have my usual existential thoughts and all, then I decide to walk back through the forest. I had seen people packing their cars and then taking out back packs and going on a trail, seems like it was some sort of favourite spot for hikers, anyway, so I decided to do that as well. It was all going well until I somehow went of the trail...anyway, so I walk on, until I get to a cluster of buildings. I am telling you, it was the strangest shit. It was just there, all of a sudden. I looked through the windows and it seemed they were studios for artists...I guess they belonged to a union or something. Anyway, behind the houses were all sorts of pottery and clay stuff and masks, and then by the water(sea), was a make shift hut, like those ones one Lekki, barbeach, etc. The whole place seemed so out of place with the woods...I can only imagine what goes on there....discussions, great bursts of ideas, music, marijuana,sex, tears, know, the usual.

Anyway, so I move on, until I get to another trail, I take a chance with this, and end up at another clearing, but this time, I meet a couple of people on the trail and they all seemed so cheerful, they even said "hi". The walk continues, and I end up at the site of another building. They were some old cars packed in front....then I get it into my head that this must be a "rehabilitation center", you know, for people trying to get off drugs...they are always showing on tv how these places are often near the sea and the woods(cos no one wants them in their community)...anyway, so now I get this thought in my head...and I think all those people I met on the way are recovering my usual imagination goes on overdrive and now I have to get the hell out of there, cos they are also always showing on tv how these people often attack innocent passersby (thats why no one wants them in their community), anyway, I find the trail and I am out of there before one of those men I met on the way decides to attack from behind a tree or something.

My walk ends well, back to my usual route, the sea, the wind, life couldn't be better. Then I do my usual big shopping, and before I know it, it is 4'oclock, my friend calls to remind me we are going to the theatre. Ehhhhhhh really? you don't say? I made such plans? Oh yes, she says, we bought the tickets and all, its at 7 o'clock. Oh yes, ofcourse, I remember. Fuck!!!!!!!!!! Had bath, did hair, did make up, ran all the way to the bus stop.

We saw Ibsen's "a doll house", had very good seats, right in front. During the pause met another friend who just had to critisize so loudly about the parts he did not like.....I was drinking my coffee and just hoping he would shut up, but oh no....he was on the roll...he went on and happy when the pause was over.

Went home in the cold winter night and had hot tea. Sunday arrived, and I had nothing planned except "Nigeria vs Ghana", so I sat with a bottle of baileys and my mobile phone,, the baileys for drinking, and the phone for texting friends and family during anguish, relief or happiness. Had quite a good time, even though Nigeria lost, I thought it was a good game. And that folks, was my weekend.

Friday, February 1, 2008

Rat Race

Na wa

It's friday yipeeeeeeeeee!

I am exceptionally happy today cos so many wonderful things have been happening all around me. Well, I think I'm gonna go out and celebrate, I've called up a couple of friends and everybody is down for a good old girls night out! Hope you all have fun this weekend! Stay cool people!