Monday, February 15, 2010

My African brothers...please...

I don't understand why African men in Europe expect to find traditional African values in European women. Its like going to a Chinese restaurant and ordering starch and banga soup. They do not have it.

If you met the woman working, living on her own, (she has probably done so since she was 18), making her own money, then why the hell do you think that by some miracle, the moment she meets you, she would turn to a submissive homebody, there to serve you and you alone. It will not happen.

And if you do not like it, you know where the airport is. I am tired of men in the diaspora complaining about women. Look around you, this is where you are. How can you not know what to expect?

If you want village wife, go to village. Also, if you are unhappy here, go home. There is no point complaining day in day out and not doing anything about it. If nobody is forcing you to remain here, then I take God beg you, go home (Meanwhile, these are the same men who anytime they return from Africa will tell you how horrible it was, horrible, terrible, no light, no water, failed state, etc).

If you can not go home for some reason, no papers, refugee, etc etc. Then as the Americans would say, SUCK IT UP. That's life. It is hard.

However, stop all this "feel so sorry for myself" business. Its pretty nauseating. Do you think its better for the African woman? No. But women adapt better. We see the situation, we analyse, we do some serious thinking and we make a decision. If we stay, then we have to adapt to the environment, and thats what we do. We do not go around depressed, feeling sorry for ourselves and blaming it all on men.

If I have to meet one more African man this winter, feeling sorry for himself, I might just explode.

Suck it up.

P.S: It is winter, it is supposed to be cold. Did you not get the memo when you moved here?

P.S.S: Also, we are not here for the special purpose of keeping you warm in winter. You want warmth, get a hot water bottle.

and one last thing, and this one is for my Nigerian brothers: Was I there when you were marrying "your oyinbo"( as you all call it)? Why do you all keep calling me to talk about your stubborn wives/girlfriends? Am I a marraige counsellor? Look, stop disturbing me with your domestic woes...

Marry who you wan marry. I don't care.





12 comments:

LusciousRon said...

You are so right! You should post this on google so they can readit! Oh I forgot, they are too busy feeling sorry for themsleves to read. I especially like the part where we are not here for their warmth. I like

2cute4u said...

hmmm, i'm nigerian, but you need to see what someone told me on the morning of val.. that i'm too succesful, assertive and intelligent for him, that he would not be able to handle me.. a full grown man.. tell you the full story on my blog.. first time here and i find that i like..
www.askchacha4free.blogspot.com

BBB said...

WORD!!!!!
GBAM!!!!

Mogaji said...

OMG i heart you for posting that song. good times

SOLOMONSYDELLE said...

lol! Waffy!!!!

babe, I cannot stand a man that whines! Not at all. I don't even tolerate it in my children and especially not in my sons. Life is tough for everybody, one way or another. We all have to stop complaining about the things we cannot change, and if we can change something, then no need to complain but to do it.

Please do not allow those men to bring the wahala from the home to you oh! That is how their wives will think you want their men. A TTTEC reader's wife sent me a very interesting message last year. *smh*

The Nigerian Fetish said...

Cheeeiii. You have killed all of those men in that one post. Lol. I dont understand, these men are always rambling about something in and out.

Myne Whitman said...

I really wonder the same things, LOL. You tell them abeg.

Fluffycutething said...

Funny how all the men are silent on this LOL....

i must also point out that even we women in Naija are no longer meeting "these" expectations we are in the 21st century abeg!!!

Ms. Catwalq said...

I don miss you oooo...

abeg, jabo the mumus. this 2010, the year of no iranu....

SHE said...

Someone is sure pissed off at whining men!

I guess they're the same world over. They only have different things to go on about.

joicee said...

Thank you for this post, I have heard a lot of such whining stories especially the ones that go like this---my "oyinbo" did this or did that....These days I have decided I won´t be an emotional toilet for any body, deal with your problem yourself...no be me bring you come here abeg

Kiibaati said...

Gosh, Booby Benson's Taxi Driver is serious old school s##t!