Monday, December 12, 2011

My friend went bananas...

I just came from a friend's place. I think she has lost it. She was screaming, banging her fist on the table, shouting right in my face, very aggressive. I can't even explain it. It was the worst scene and also the most dramatic scene I have ever been involved in. Totally unbelievable. But first, the details...

She was pissed off at her daughter's choir mistress. Why? Because the girl had been practicing for a huge concert which they had today by the way. Last week, when they had one of the rehearsals, my friend had called to say her daughter could not make it because she couldn't bring her herself and she can't ask the babysitter to do it because the person was already doing her big favour by babysitting. Choir mistress then suggested if the daughter could not be dropped off by another kid's mother (practically a neighbour). My friend then started screaming at the choir mistress and telling her that she has no right to tell her how she should fix a baby sitter, bla bla bla, that just because she is an immigrant does not mean she can not think for herself, etc etc etc.

When she told me this story, I understood why she got pissed but since I work with kids as well, I can also understand that if it is for something huge like a concert, the teacher perhaps was just anxious about the daughter's role for the concert and in my opinion, I don't think she necessarily meant anything bad.

Anyway, when my friend told me how she had screamed at the teacher, I simply said this:

"I understand why you were upset but If that had been me, I would not have taken it so seriously"

That's all I said.

She went off the handle.

She just went nuts. Screaming, crying, saying stuff about how I was on "the blonde bitch's" side. How "no bitch" should tell her that she has not seen "the whole picture", how she spends lots of money on babysitting every year...

But the biggest insult, here it is. The one that mothers always think will hurt you because you are not one. the one that for some fucking reason, they think will be a huge blow...

She said: "And anyway, you don't have a child"

All this while, mind you, I was just sitting and watching her. When she said that, I simply packed my things (I had to take the last bus anyway so its not as if I could stay longer) and said: "All these accusations are your own words. I have not said anything of all these things you are saying. I am your friend so I am always on your side but we are very different and I am just saying that I would have reacted differently had that been me. And anyway, this is totally unnecessary. Thank you for the dinner".

I can't even be angry because I think she has alcohol issues. She and another of her friends had finished a box of wine (you know those wine boxes...how many litres are they? whatever) and another bottle of something.

However, when she calls tomorrow, I am going to tell her that while I understand her issues, that will be the first and last time she ever screams at me and insults me for whatever reason.

I will take this but only this once.

She will have to apologize and then I will also suggest that we don't meet or contact each other for a while because I don't want to see her for some time.

If she does not want to apologize for whatever reason, I guess that will be it then.

I am not sad... just worried for her. That was totally crazy. It can't be normal to react like that.

I am tired.

7 comments:

Pretty Lashes said...

Oh wow, that's so horrible! I would have probably reacted the same as you.

Take it with a pinch of salt, she is probably going through some serious issues going on she doesn't feel comfortable talking about yet, that's what usually happens when people have these sort of outbursts.

Molara Brown said...

That is the worst statement ever and I wonder why women are quick to use that to hurt fellow women.

Please give her time, I hope she gets over whatever is troubling her.

Myne said...

Your friend is probably going through some troubled times and may need you more now than ever. try to get her to apologize but maybe not cut the thread?

Akin Akintayo said...

((Hugs))

Patrice said...

Be patient with her, but wary.

24yearOldTeEnAgeR said...

Oh wow.

SHE said...

Its a good thing you understand that the reaction is probably alcohol related, maybe even with deeper roots.
If its not too much trouble, you may try to help her later...