A once good friend of mine had a baby shower. Other friends were there and people commented on the pictures(facebook, naturally, where else?). Here is the dilemma, she NEVER told me she was pregnant in the first place. I mean, I know facebook is the new way to announce stuff...all of a sudden a picture of a big belly or wedding pics or status changes, etc etc, but here is the deal. I see my facebook messages in my mailbox. I recieve messages and I send some. I don't think I need to be on facebook 24/7 to do that. The most important thing for me is that people that need to reach me are able to and if I need to reach someone, I can. Finish. I hardly look at pictures except somebody asks me to...and even then, I look at the specific picture I have to and I move on. I don't like people pictures. Five hundred pictures of the same people in different moments (..now I am eating...now I am walking...now I am dancing...now I am smiling seductively...now I am waving...). I get bored easily. Point is, people announcing stuff with pictures will miss me cos I don't hang out long enough to get the gist.
Lets say I was not on facebook, how the hell was I supposed to know?
Its a fucking pain I tell you. If she had told me in the first place, I would have said "congrats"...or should I just say the "congrats" and get it over with? But if I do that, then she would wonder why I am just saying it now...
Jeez....I will just wait until the baby pops out!
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12 comments:
I suppose you can either learn to get used to the feeling of "once good friend" neglect (because she will not be your last once good friend - in fact, I doubt she is your first!) or just be thankful for what she does still personally share with you. The latter is better for the soul. If you still feel connected to your (once good) friend, then why not congratulate her, telling her the truth, that you only just found out about her pregnancy (even if it was through Facebook!).
Hmmmmmm I am thinking about it but the thing is she did not "share" anything with me. I just happened to see the pics on another friend's page...does that count as "sharing" with me or not?
I will agree with Patrice, go one step further and answer your question by saying it does count as sharing.
i think the point is that its ok to have 'once good friends'. you either accept it and ignore their presence in your life, or you accept it and still remain... cordial.
i think patrice meant 'what she does still personally share with you' more in general, than specifically about this event. does she still share anything personally with you?
you should probably just congratulate her anyway, since you already know. i mean, if you wait, you may not know when the baby drops until u see pics and then it might be too late...
even tho, if she intentionally didnt tell you then she might read your post-facebook felicitations as a pointed 'now i know. there!'
(ok ok, i only added that last bit for tatafo-ic reasons. :P)
Guess u need to not beat yrself over it.. I mean I got to know two of my really tight guys frm yesteryear were married on FaceBook..That was all the more disheartening because they were on my page and we'd shipped messages back and forth severally.. At some stage we all need to move on, friendships wax and wane and time modifies everything.....
Yeah, I think you should just say congrats to her and move on. You shouldnt worry yourself since you only just got to know...she can worry about her not telling you and not the other way.
But then again my sis has been in this situation and it is kinda hard to call up people and say oh by the way I'm pregnant, unless again you guys are really close.
So I'm hoping u guys were really close hence why you are bothered so much, then I guess you are justified
@naapali: Thanks for the advice oh... how u dey?
@geisha: hahahaha, No, she does not share anything with me. I haven't heard from her for over a year or so.
@Danny: yeah...I think i'll just take it as a natural development which I would normally if not for this damn facebook!
@naijababe: we were very close at some point...but we just drifted apart naturally...life just got on and the phone calls , chats and texts somehow dwindled...I think the last time I heard from her was when I sent a birthday message or so and she replied. That was a year ago...
Thanks all for your opinions.
Hello,
Talking about not able to reach someone. Ive been trying to reach you without success, send me a number I can reach you by wherever you are asap. Haba, Im not on facebook much myself and besides I prefer to hear voices.
Kramer
Hello,
Talking about not able to reach someone. Ive been trying to reach you without success, send me a number I can reach you by wherever you are asap. Haba, Im not on facebook much myself and besides I prefer to hear voices.
Kramer
I agree with Patrice.
confront her with the truth.
By the way, am a waffarian too
You owe me an update....haba!!!!!
Facebook is the devil's instrument men...it has resulted in a dismissal of common standards of decorum...I mean, why are you "poking" me?
@ catwalq
- because it feels good.
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