Sunday, March 25, 2007

See this small girl oh!

I am at home, a bottle of white wine by my side. Alone. Everything went wrong. I am supposed to be buggying away, at the hottest club in town.It all went wrong. The day started out quite good. I was in a good mood, the sun was shining, I went for a walk, I bought a new pair of jeans, I was happy with it. I washed my hair, dressed up, met up with Oga aproko's sister and her friends (all 25, it was her birthday), we were all slushed. That small girl, Sarah, was calling for a taxi, we were all talking and chatting away, I was having a conversation with one of the girls, all of a sudden Sarah turns around and screams at me:"Quiet!" ah ah, na me she dey talk to? okay, make i no talk first, make i wait, make she finish for phone first, na so, this conversation come take place.

Me: Sarah, please dont scream at me next time, don't scream "quiet" at me, it was quite rude.
Sarah: So what should i say, SHUT UP?

See dis babe oh, if i woz am for here, na police dem go call.

Me: Look, Sarah, I am always respectful to you and everybody else here, so i see no reason why you should be rude to me.
Sarah: hahahahahhahahaha should i respect you? i will talk to you anyhow i damn well please!
Me: Then you can go to hell!

And I left. Anyway, na so (sigh), i came home, opened a bottle of wine, and I am almost drunk. I think I will listen to some Bob Marley and think of my retirement plan.

17 comments:

Ubong Da said...
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Waffarian said...
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Jack Bloggs said...

Waffarian! You mezz up! Wetin i talk? YOU MEZZ UP!... I no talk say you for woze am o! But as i read that blog, i sensed a little politeness in the way you addressed her (which is the christian way to do things)... BUT for the fact that she annoyed you so much - hence only you down one whole bottle of white wine, you for give am wetin dem dey call LAST WARNING... You know as you Warri girls dey do now? You for confuse am with grammar, add one wicked look on top the yarns. You know, without being aggressive about it, make people no go think say you won fight.

Lol. As you come drunk that night, hope say you sleep well?

Idemili said...

I would have bitch-slapped her manners out of her, idiot akwuna. Tell me you at least got one strand of her hair so that we can give Ubong to do 'Ojuju Calabar?'

Kidding, Ubong!

Ok, Waffarian, breathe. And ignore the bish for now. Don't let me down next time.

Waffarian said...

@jack bloggs, oh boy, i sleep well well hahahahhahah! you know say i no like wahala, i no dey like people dey mess up my positive vibrations! ahahahahahahah!
@Idemili, I know say I yab, big time! chei! i dey shame for myself!

IJEOMA said...

damn..
dont let it get to you... na so life be.. some stupid fucking human beings.. in this world

Ubong Da said...
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UnNaked Soul said...

na dis kin tin make me tell bush wey saddam dey hide... make people no sabi respect dem sef... no vex my sista, na the piss wey dey catch am and the stick wey she put for yansh dey pain am... she just decided to pour her frustration on you.... thank God say u handle am maturely *wink*

gypsygirl said...

chai! u con write this thing for here,na wa o! why u still care sef i tell u that night make we welle her for one corner,kolobi her and beat shit outta her bleached white hair including the oga sis o! anyway fellow waffi make i no put u for trouble sha but u knw if no bi jand we de eh kai! dat beatings go sweet well well.con go house play stereoman dance hahaha....later!

gypsygirl said...

chai! u con write this thing for here,i no tell u dat nite make we welle dem for one corner beat the nonscense commot dat thier bleached blonde head,shwo if no bi say na jand we de eh,u knw now,dat beating go sweet well well,con go house go dance stereo man.hahahaha...waffy! i de hail o! later naw!

Anonymous said...

chai! waffy u no say dat beating for sweet o! i ter u dat nite now,make we welle dem con beat nonscense commot deir body,u knw now waffy style...kai! if no be say na jand we de eh...hey see beating! shwo.
anywhaw sha next time eh see wozz na u go give am,if u no fit just shuat my name i go finish am well well.useless oyinbo girls with dier bleashed fake hair.abeg waffi sis later now we go yarn.

Anonymous said...

waffy, i dey fear you oh!

wey oga aproko to bring that sweet side out again? lol

Confused Naija Girl said...

heehehe abeg no woz the girl oh! LMAO !!

Waffarian said...

@ijeoma, no mind the babe, and the most annoying thing is that I am always nice to these babes when I see them!
@unnakedsoul, ehhhh, I managed oh, but it was serious management.
@nky, don't mind her, mumu!
@londonchameleon, oga aproko don travell, hehehehheheehe!
@anonymous, hehhehehe thank you jare, i see say the thing pain you wellu wellu!

Waffarian said...

@confusednaijagirl: heheheheheh I go woz am next time!

4wardnfiaca said...

lol, i commend you say you let the stupidity rool off you jare my sista.
but i still think you for at least twist the girl's ears for a couple of seconds... if only we dey naija...

Anonymous said...

nonsense! Why u no give am wetin she been dey ask for? U for dash am 3 hot, dirty slaps. don't listen to CNG, slap am well well