Wahala don land. Part 2

Infact, the more I think of it, the more I have come to believe say if not for Oga aproko, chei, I no for dey this wahala. As they say, a woman's intuition is definitely on the mark! Anyway, na so 2 days ago, I come home, Oga aproko come begin im campaign for wahala again.

Oga aproko: You have a couple of "missed calls"
Waffarian: Ehhhn ehn.
Oga aproko: check who it is
Waffarian: I will check later! let me eat first now.....ah ah!
Oga aproko: I´ll check............
Waffarian: hissssssssssssssssssssssss, who was it?
Oga aproko: Its your friend Martina! perhaps she is already in the country!
Waffarian: Okay.
Oga aproko: Aren't you going to call back?
Waffarian: I'll call later! what is your own self?
Oga aproko: Nothing! I am just helping you out, cos you always say your friends are upset cos you never return their calls.........
Waffarian: Well, this one is not a friend.
Oga aproko: Thats not a nice thing to say........sometimes.........you are a so strange......honestly you are such a complex person.........why don't you just call her and get it over with? its just coffee!how hard can it be?
Waffarian: Leave me alone.
Anyway, to cut the long story short, wahala called again and this was our conversation
Waffarian: So what time do you want to meet up for coffee?
Martina: What time is okay for you?
Waffarian: Well, I am quite busy after lunch, so it will have to be before............ what about 10?
Martina:.............silence.........I am kind of busy then..............what about around lunch time? 12:30?
Waffarian: Ehnnnnnnnnnn ............Okay, see you then..........
Martina:...............waffarian...........before you drop..........incase I don't see you.........the police might be contacting you
SAY WHAT???????HE?????WHAT THE FUCK? i KNEW IT! ??????????????
Waffarian:(very calm and adult like, if I may say so myself):...........Police? why?
Martina: Well, cos of my relationship with Peter
Waffarian: Peter?
Martina: You know my boyfriend Peter, I left him two yrs ago
Waffarian(AND HOW THE HELL DOES THAT CONCERN ME???BITCH?):.........Okay.........but I still don't understand............why will they want to talk to me?
Martina:............I can't talk about this over the phone..........I'll explain everything when we meet.......
Waffarian: Well, you have to tell me something now.........cos i don't understand.........
Martina: Well, i discovered something very bad about him while we were together...........I can't talk about it...........anyway, I mean the police will just want to know how you thought my relationship with him was............I mean, you were at our place right? you saw him?
OGINI????????WETIN? I WAS THERE ONCE FOR DINNER!
Waffarian: Well............I can't imagine what I saw that will be helpful..............I mean, i don't know so much............
Martina: Just tell them what you know
Waffarian: But...........I don't know anything........what happened? what did he do?
Martina: I can't talk about it........well...........i discovered he was "buying girls" you know................
The biggest silence in the whole fucking world

Waffarian: (OGINI? WHICH KAIN YAWA BE THIS?) what??????????????
Martina: I'll tell you all about it when we meet.

Na so, my people, all my life, I never enter yawah before oh, the only thing I've ever done was to ride the trains and buses without ticket, but that was a long time ago, during my bohemian days............now this gal wan involve me for dis kain nonsense! which kain thing be dis ehhhhhhn?